Equal Opportunity Rant

As you know, I've done my fair share of ranting against men who say stupid things and end up making us all look like idiots. Well, I just finished reading another article in this month's Details that did a similar thing for women.

In the article "That Was No Accident" the author takes a look at the "trend" of women in committed relationships allowing themselves to accidentally on purpose get pregnant - without consulting the boyfriend, husband, booty call first. Now, they say it's not to trap the man into a relationship but, rather, because they just feel like it's time for them to be a mother. Well, that's all well and good but shouldn't the guy have any type of vote in the matter? I guess we do and it's called a condom.

"I see and hear people talk about it, and I understand. I get it," she says, "and I don't even think it's that manipulative. It's more like, 'Hey, the timing is right for me. I got pregnant—oops! Well, it's here, let's have it.' I think that's more the way it is now than it was back in the day when you had to marry someone before you got pregnant. Marriage doesn't matter now."

"A lot of us feel like it's not even really fair that men should get to vote, considering they could be 72 and, with a little Viagra, have another baby," says Vicki Iovine, author of The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy. "For us women, it's really a limited window. We know that boys who grow up to become men don't necessarily want to be men. They like to be boys. And so women say, 'You know what? He's gonna just have to snap out of it—and my pregnancy will be the thing to do it.'"

Just how many women act on that presumption is hard to say. According to FDA figures, one in a thousand of them should get pregnant over the course of a year if they're using the Pill exactly as prescribed. But it is estimated that in reality 50 times that many get pregnant. There's no way of knowing how much of that disparity can be explained away by "intentional" oversight, but that's a big gap to chalk up to carelessness.

Let me help you out a little, ladies. Turn down the crazy a notch or two and maybe you won't have to go behind some poor guys back to have a baby. Maybe you'll actually find a guy who's as committed to you and fatherhood as you are to motherhood. Or keep the crazy turned up to 11 and get ready to take in a lot of stray cats.

Okay, that was not nice. Cats all deserve a nice place to call home.

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